Yes, No, Maybe

I'll never say "Maybe" to her.

NOTE: If you think you’ve seen this post before, you are not wrong. I’m re-organizing the order of appearance of my posts, as a result, you’ll be seeing some old posts re-surfacing, but things should be “regularized” in due course. I ask for your forgiveness and your patience.

Every year, at the beginning of the new year, I would be asked if I’ve made any resolutions for the new year.

My standard response has always been “My resolution this year is not to make resolutions.”

Well, maybe, there is one resolution for 2011.

And that is to stop reading certain blogs.

Every time I read the blog posts of some people, I get irked.

Some bloggers are so self-centered, narcissistic and self righteous.

I’ve vowed never to read them again.

Yup, why get riled up by some retards and their meaningless drivel?

No ifs, no buts, no maybes.

“Maybe” is a bad word.

Let me explain.

In the olden days if you’ve accepted an invitation, you show up.

That was it.

Nowadays with ready access to technology it is so easy to cancel at the last minute – just send a text message!

Recently I had a board meeting cancelled less than one day in advance.

Prior to cellular phones and BlackBerries that would never have happened.

Technology is a great enabler indeed.

Worse, it allows people to become complacent and show up late for meetings – again, just send a text message! “On the way” or “Running a little late, please wait.”

Cell phones even come with ready made templates for your use.

Just hit a button, that’s it!

Sure, technology is an enabler.

Among other things, technology has enabled us to be  rude!

What’s worse than last minute cancellations or showing up late is saying “Maybe” when invited to a meeting.

It seems it wasn’t long ago that invitations required definitive answers. We would receive a phone call or an invitation card requesting our attendance at an event, and we were expected to call or write back – with an affirmative or negative response.

But then electronic invites came along and made it way too easy for us to wriggle out of social engagements. All we had to do was to SMS “Maybe.” Once we saw how easy that was – no stressful decision or long explanation necessary – we got used to becoming rude.

No commitment. No consequences.

Or so we’d like to think.

“Saying ‘maybe’ may seem to be about ambivalence, but it is really about power and boundaries,” says Prudence Gourguechon, a psychiatrist in Chicago. “Person A who says, ‘Yeah, maybe,’ essentially puts recipient B on hold. B is powerless.”

Sigh, why do we make our lives so complicated?

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