Are There No More Ladies in Singapore?


At Starbucks, Jem, Jurong Gateway Road, last Thursday, two woman – one was accompanied by a child – sat for a good two hours at least, talking on top of their voices, oblivious of the other customers around them, WITHOUT buying a single drink from Starbucks. (See picture above.)

This happened during the busy breakfast hour when potential customers were looking for places to sit. It’s bad enough that almost every single Starbucks has turned into “libraries” where students park themselves all day, buy one of the cheapest drinks available, and take over the entire cafe. Why the fuck do students need to study at Starbucks? I’ve said enough on this blog already, do a search for my posts related to this subject if you care.

I remember overhearing my mum educating my sis many years ago when we were still young, on how to behave like a lady.

Nowadays I see more and more of our women bellowing like foghorns in public. Those two in Starbucks last Thursday were not only talking so loudly, they were laughing and guffawing in a most unladylike and obnoxious manner; I mean, the entire Starbucks reverberated with the din they were causing. What message is being sent to that kid (partially hidden in the picture above) with them? And talking about uncouth women, I notice many of our women today sauntering around in shorts so tiny that half their butts could be seen, not to mention their butt cracks, while some sit with their legs widely open, with nary a care in the world.

Sure I believe in women’s lib and have nothing against women burning their bras and sure, I sympathize with those who find the weather kinda hot here but such visual assaults are really repulsive! Well, there’s no accounting for taste, I guess. Anyway, if a man forgets to zip his fly, he’ll probably be accused of indecent exposure, but women seem to get away with intentional “wardrobe malfunctions.”

It’s time we teach our women how to behave in a more civilized manner!

I hope AWARE is aware of this.

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So Pho of Crap


If you crave for the personal touch in customer service, be sure to eat at So Pho at Jem, Jurong Gateway Road.

Each time I ate there, the server’s thumb was in the soup!

Once, when my dining companion gently chided the server, she became defensive and retorted that she was simply doing what management has taught her to do.

Sure, I believe in the personal touch but I sure don’t appreciate anyone’s body part in my soup.

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Adulation Gone Nuts


Next month, The Catholic Church will declare Mother Teresa a saint.

Dr Aroup Chatterjee is bristling.

In 2003, he published Mother Teresa: The Final Verdict.

The London-based physician has been studying Mother Teresa for decades and his book cataloged evidence that the Missionaries of Charity led by the nun is not quite what it portrays itself to be.

In fact, his research has led to a documentary entitled Hell’s Angel. The documentary delivers a searing criticism of Mother Teresa and her work.

Of course few believe Dr Chatterjee or the documentary.

Part of the reason for this, Dr Chatterjee believes, can be attributed to the Nobel Peace Prize that the nun won in 1979.

The Catholic Church may be canonizing Mother Teresa next month, but many of us have already regarded our pastors and priests as saints – superheroes beyond reproach.

This despite the fact that we have seen so many such people, “men of the cloth” running afoul of the laws.

For all the good that genuine shepherds do, it is the conduct of their fallen brethren that tends to stick in our minds. One reason is the wide gap between society’s high expectations of an honorable calling and the often egregious nature of the actions of its black sheep.

In the west, preachers like Jim Baker, Jimmy Swaggart, Peter Popoff,  Morris Cerullo, Robert Tilton, WV Grant, Bob Moorehead,  Roy Clements, John Paulk, Paul Crouch, Douglas Goodman, Kent Hovind, Ted Haggard, Paul Barnes, Lonnie Latham, Gilbert Deya, Richard Roberts, Earl Paulk, Coy Private, Michael Reid, Joe Barron, George Alan Rekers, Eddie Long, Vaughn Reeves, Stephen Green, Albert Odulele, Kenneth Copeland, Creflo Dollar, Benny Hin, Randy White, Thomas Wesley Weeks have had all their misdemeanors exposed. And that’s just a partial list. Let’s not forget all those thousands of priests who were caught molesting young altar boys.

And in Singapore, everyone knows that the pastor – and members of his inner circle –  of City Harvest Church have been convicted to polish the bars and pacing the floors in Changi.

Our blind faith in pastors and priests will get us hurt badly. Many of these so-called religious leaders are parasites who have never done a day of honest work in their lives, many use plagiarized homilies and some even deploy ghostwriters for their written work. A lot of these scoundrels are political animals with glib tongues whose full-time jobs seem to be engaging in games of one-upmanship. That’s a serious abnegation of their duties.

They live comfortably from donations made by suckers who have been conned to join their congregations. And many of their parishioners are more than happy to endow them with gifts of money and meals and whatnot because of the mistaken belief that these bloodsuckers have made sacrifices and have left lucrative careers in the secular world to “answer the call of God.” What a myth! Just look at the lifestyles of some of these ripoff artists! I have also witnessed some of these crooks walking away with gifts such as cars, luxury watches, lavish meals, even hotel stays and vacations and free services of all kinds. Maybe some believers think their places in heaven are assured if they treat their religious leaders well. And by religious leaders, I also use the term to refer to the laypeople and hangers-on who cling onto the coattails of the clergy. An annual audit and declaration of their assets should be made mandatory by the Commissioner of Charities and any culprit living a lifestyle inconsistent with that expected of religious leaders should be thoroughly investigated!

The next time you visit a place of worship, ask yourself “Am I contributing to the creation of monsters?”

Remember, the leaders there are as human – if not more human – as anyone of us.

They are not saints, even when their organizations and followers regard them as saints.

They are more like wolves in sheep’s clothing.

I know because I have encountered many church ministers who are angels and I have also met those who epitomize evil.

It’s amazing how far a clergyman’s collar can get you.

For many, it’s a meal ticket and more.

It’s time we get those who are swindlers off the gravy train!

Their certitude that nothing can destroy them must be eliminated!

They must know that there is no safety in fake piety.

You don’t see faith healers working in hospitals for the same reason you don’t see psychics winning the lottery.

Well, that’s because they operate in a world created entirely out of fantasy and illusion!

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“Zero chance” of Haze?


In April, Nazir Foead, head of Indonesia’s Peatland Restoration Agency said there is “zero chance” that a haze of last year’s magnitude will blanket Singapore and in the region.

Well, the haze returned last Friday and at one stage, crossed into “unhealthy” range.

I cordially invite Mr Nazir Foead and the rest of the jokers who run Indonesia to visit Singapore to come eat his words.

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Sharon Loh said “All Singaporean Men are Buayas” and I Disagree

Must be from Singapore.

Must be from Singapore.

On August 21st, there was an article in The Sunday Times, entitled Blindedsided by Dirty Old Man, written by Sharon Loh.

She wrote:

Singapore is such a safe place that I was surprised when my younger daughter didn’t want to go running alone during our trip back last year.

I discovered why when we went to the park connector near where we were staying.

From some distance back, I could see a man, who looked to be in his 50s, running alongside her and saying something to her. He stopped only because she kicked up her pace and left him in her dust.

When I asked her later, she said he was asking her for her name. My 16-year-old. Being hit on by a man more than three times her age.

On another occasion, my daughters were lounging by the condominium pool when they were invited by some boys to a movie.

“Wow,” I told anyone who would listen, “Singaporean men are buayas.” (“Buaya” is the Malay word for “crocodile” but is also a colloquial term meaning “lecher.”)

Loh also said that her daughters’ 16-year-old friend, visiting Singapore for the first time, was the recipient of a flattering remark on her first ride on the MRT by a man “old enough to be her father who should have known better.” “She didn’t know where to look,” wrote Loh.

Loh, who now lives in the USA, then went on to say:

“In our home town of Chapel Hill, North Carolina, men do not make a habit of staring openly or passing remarks on women in the street.”

In one fell swoop, Loh insulted ALL the men in Singapore – including her own father and husband – and chose to ignore the  unsavory part of life in the US such as the mass shootings and the rapes, just because from her experience, men in her part of the US – Chapel Hill, North Carolina, where less than 60,000 people reside – “do not make a habit of staring openly or passing remarks on women in the street.”

Yes, there are lechers and perverts on the loose, but not every man who speaks to a teenager is a buaya. (Women should stop thinking that every man is trying to hit on them!) Also, not every man who pays a compliment to a woman is a sexual deviant. And if you don’t know where to look when someone pays you a compliment, you should perhaps sign up for a class on social etiquette. Plus, if your teenage daughters don’t get invitations to movies from other boys, then you better be worried.

Loh feels safer in North Carolina, it seems. She called Chapel Hill “our home town.”

Maybe no man there wants to look at her and her daughters! Maybe the buayas in North Carolina have better taste than those here.

I wish Loh many years of happy living in North Carolina. If she thinks she has found Utopia on earth, then maybe she shouldn’t come back here.

It never fails to astound me when those who have the opportunity to live overseas lose no time to denigrate their own country and their own countrymen.

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Dissoi Logoi

FraudsterAs a young man (many years ago) I toyed with the idea of getting a motorcycle and when I sought my father’s opinion, he highlighted to me both the pros and cons of using a motorcycle as a means of daily trainsport.

True, a motorbike is more affordable than a car, said my dad, but a motorbike is “flesh wrapping metal” whereas a car is “metal wrapping flesh.” That analogy drove home the point about how dangerous a motorbike can be on our busy roads.

Since then, I have always made it a personal responsibility to present both sides of an argument. For example, when it comes to investing, I always caution friends that big returns involve big risks; take smaller risks, and you earn lesser returns, but at least you won’t lose your shirt.

But some people are uncomfortable with straight talk. Long before my move to WordPress (and hence this blog), I had another blog entitled Straight from the Shoulder for several years and while I received lots of accolades for my straight talk, I also had people telling me to avoid topics that will make ohers uncomfortable.

The late Lee Kuan Yew comes to mind when the topic of straight talk comes up. Here are some of his notorious sayings:

“I have never been over concerned or obsessed with opinion polls or popularity polls. I think a leader who is, is a weak leader. If you are concerned with whether your rating will go up or down, then you are not a leader. You are just catching the wind…you will go where the wind is blowing. And that’s not what I am in this for.”

“Anybody who decides to take me on needs to put on knuckle-dusters. If you think you can hurt me more than I can hurt you, try.”

“If you are a troublemaker…it’s our job to politically destroy you. Everybody knows that in my bag I have a hatchet, and a very sharp one. You take me on, I take my hatchet, we meet in the cul-de-sac.”

I’m sure Lee’s words caused a lot of discomfort to a lot of people but responsible leaders are derelict in their duties when they sugar-coat truths and only tell nice stories appealing to populist sentiments.

Even in our places of worship, it is the onus of religious leaders to remind those they are shepherding that the Almighty is not all about grace and forgiveness, that the god of all religions is not saccharin-sweet goody two-shoes but is also a god of wrath who will not hesitate to strike sinners dead, as the holy scriptures have more than adequately documented.

Writing this, I am reminded of China and its decision to ignore the recent ruling by the Arbitral Tribunal constituted under Article 287, Annex VII of UNCLOS, the United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea.

A couple of years ago, the Philippines filed for arbitration against China for infringing on its territories and the country has just scored a historic legal victory against China. 

In the past few years,  China has rattled most of its neighbors by claiming “historic rights” (a baseless concept based on pre-modern historiography) over much of adjacent waters such as the South China Sea.

But, in fact, as the arbitration court in The Hague makes it clear, China has violated the rights of countries such as the Philippines to exploit natural resources within their Exclusive Economic Zone, a sea zone prescribed by UNCLOS over which a state has special rights regarding the exploration and use of marine resources, including energy production from water and wind.  

However, China has boycotted the entire proceedings and has refused to acknowledge the court’s jurisdiction. It fact, it has said it neither accepts nor honors the ruling by the tribunal. It calls it a kangaroo court with no legitimacy. Audaciously, China and its sycophantic supporters reiterate that the arbitration is unlawful. It says that the arbitration violates certain clauses of UNCLOS. It also claims that the Philippines has previously agreed to resolve disputes through bilateral agreements, but has broken its promises and since the country has broken both laws and promises, China says the arbitration is therefore illegal. 

China’s propaganda machine went into overdrive and those besotted with it as well as all the “experts” and supporters on its side (ie in its pocket) continue to say the “right” things to support its stand. Moreover, people blinded by their own narrow world views are unable to see the truth. If you have an axe to grind against the Americans or the Japanese or the Philippines, then China can do no wrong.

I am no lawyer but in my view, China is wrong! Not just wrong, but very very wrong! It is wrong in principle, in moral, and in every aspect of justice! In principle, because it is signatory to the UNCLOS. China signed the UNCLOS in 1982 and ratified it in 1996. When it ratified the Law of the Sea Convention, it agreed to all of the provisions of the Convention. 

In short, China technically consented to undergo arbitration by signing the United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea, yet refuses to accept its ruling. It is utter shamelessness to disregard something you have agreed upon with others!

Under the legal principle of Estoppel, you must not disagree later with things you have previously agreed and signed! Estoppel is a collective name given to a group of legal doctrines in common law legal systems whereby a person is prevented from making assertions that are contradictory to their prior position on certain matters before the court. In other words, the principle which precludes a person from asserting something contrary to what is implied by a previous action or statement of that person or by a previous pertinent judicial determination.

Long story short, you cannot pick and choose – you abide totally or you don’t at all. You cannot cherry-pick!

So when it comes to religious leaders, in my mind, there can be no greater sin than for religious leaders to present a lopsided theology of their faiths and when they avoid straight talk and preach only peachy feel-good homilies so as to be popular among worshipers, they do their congregations a great disservice. You don’t do anyone favors by avoiding blunt truth. I am no theologian, just a rank amateur, but any retard will know that religious leaders trying to win popularity contests are just frauds “playing church” and I take comfort that the omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent God is not mocked.

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Mind Fuck; Come Get It!


A friend was given an impossible KPI, which he surpassed by several hundred percent.

Instead of rewarding him, his company found ways not to compensate him for what was rightfully due to him in commission payments. It tried ways and means to claw back his earnings. It continued draining blow after blow upon him, even when he was down.

He asked me for advice, so I gave him some tips. 

There are many arrows in my quiver and one pointer I shared with my friend was this: “If someone is screwing you, go above them. When they get wind of the fact that people more powerful and influential than them have been notified, they will shit bricks. This will shift their attention from battling against you to protecting themselves from someone else. They will live the rest of their miserable lives watching their backs.”

Remember, The Art of War was written by Sun Tzu, a Chinese, several centuries before Christ, and I teach it at five different universities, in addition to my class on Machiavellianism.

Sun Tzu sees war not so much as a matter of destroying the enemy materially and physically (although that too play a role), but of unsettling the enemy psychologically; his goal is to force the enemy’s leadership and society from a condition of harmony, in which they can resist effectively, toward one of chaos (“luan”), which is tantamount to defeat.

If your mind is “luan” all the time, you are screwed.

Every which way.

Sun Tzu, the original mind-fucker.

Finally, a word to those political animals who jerk us around: Do we look that stupid or what? Don’t forget, we Chinese kids have been taught Sun Tzu since elementary school.

And one more thing, those who can’t afford to lose should not play politics. Because when you lose, you lose everything, and I mean, everything!

And Sun Tzu masters never lose.

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I Need Schooling on Feelings


Decades ago, my uncle had a thriving business until an apprentice went down the road and opened a similar business. He even appropriated the company name and added a “xin” prefix to the name. “Xin” means “new” in Chinese. Usurped!

It’s like a waiter at MacDonald’s opening a burger joint down the road and naming it “New MacDonald’s.” What a shameless usurper!

On Saturday, I wondered how US Olympics swimmer Michael Phelps felt when the school boy from Singapore, Joseph Schooling, who used to idol-worship him, beat him to win a gold at Rio eight years later. It was Singapore’s first-ever Olympic gold medal.

If I run a char kway teow stall and my stall assistant goes and nab a certificate saying he is now also a char kway teow master, how would I feel?

How would I feel if I were a masterchef teaching people to cook, and a kitchen help suddenly shows up with a certificate saying he too is now not only a teacher, but a “certified” one, with a piece of paper to prove it?

Indeed how would I feel if I were a kung fu master and a helper would one day show up brandishing a certificate showing me he too is now a martial arts coach?

Michael Phelps, ever the gentlemanly sportsman, had very complimentary and nice things to say to Joseph Schooling. 

The media interviews following his epic triumph showed Joseph Schooling to be a very well-bred, humble and gracious sportsman as well, despite his rather annoying accent. (I have lived and worked in the States far longer than he has, and I didn’t pick up any phony accent.)

But I am Lohcifer, I am not Michael Phelps or Joseph Schooling and I am not magnanimous. And I don’t think too highly of people who steal my thunder. So Mr Phelps and Mr Schooling, please school me on how to feel and what to say!

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A Bamboo Pipe from Taiwan


Another gift from David of Taiwan, accompanied by six kilos of highly priced karasumi and two cases of the best Taiwanese kaoliang. (Dream on Lohficer, dream on!)

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Thoughts on Our 51st


Yesterday was National Day, our 51st.

For me it was a time for reflection.

What has our beloved country done to us?

It has dropped us like a hot potato the moment we turned 40; preferring to hire young punks who think they know it all – but who would crumble at the slightest pressure – at a fraction of what it would cost to keep us on the payroll.

As we age, it tells us to lower our expectations and to switch careers – from manager to janitor, from secretary to hotel housekeeping crew member – at less than half our previous salary.

It hires foreigners when many of us are able to do the job, and do it way better; it seems easily swayed by articulate, smooth-talking “foreign talents” who excel in self promotion and who can’t always deliver.

It seems to treat outsiders better, and the rest of us citizens like doormats.

It ignores the poor and the disadvantaged by convincing itself that all that can be done to help the population at the bottom of the pyramid have been done, that it is our very own fault if we are still in deep shit.

It believes that old people collecting scraps and garbage for sale at a pittance do so because they want to get some physical exercise.

Its priority seems to be to ensure that ass kissers and apple polishers, after their stint as top dogs in the armed forces, get parachuted into CEO jobs for which they have zero qualification and experience.

It gives a millionaire minister a bypass that costs only eight bucks while the rest of us lament that it’s cheaper to die than to get sick.

It makes the disgruntled and the weak-willed flee to third-rate countries and get treated like dirt by the ang mohs there.

It has pitted us against one another as it focuses on elitism and meritocracy; it has reduced us to competitive animals, reflected – among other behaviors – in the inconsiderate way we drive, and – listen! – even in our places of worship, religious leaders play politics. (These diabolical bloodsucking swindlers and scammers who suffer from mental constipation and verbal diarrhea ought to comport themselves with a certain degree of decorum instead of engaging in one-upmanship!)

For sure, Singapore has done right by many, and there is much to be thankful for. For comparison, just look at our neighboring countries, kleptocracies where common thieves, buffoons and thugs rule the roost. Or turn to the west where Europe, despite its rich history and culture, is in a sorry mess and to the US of A, where out of a population of over 300 million people, the best they could produce is a Hillary Clinton and a Donald Trump as presidential candidates – both big-time con artists and barefaced liars, personification of greed and evil.

But one other – random – thought before I hit the bottle: many people say “I’m proud to be Singaporean” so my question to those who make this rather meaningless bullshit declaration is “What have you done for this country? Does the mere fact that you were born here makes you feel proud? If you were born in Venezuela, would you be proud to be Venezuelan?”

Indeed, what price progress?

Is the loss of your soul worth it?

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