Stupid is Ugly

Despite all the medical and technological advances to our day, there is unfortunately no cure for stupidity.

I pray that as I grow older, I won’t be any more stupid than I already am.

I’ve made many stupid mistakes in my life – and hurt many people along the way – but how much more stupid can I get?

Honestly you don’t want to know. I mean, if a PhD can tell us that heavy floods occur in Singapore only once in 50 years, what hope is there for the rest of us whose highest academic qualification is a graduation cert from some PAP kindergarten?

I know someone who’s younger than me who takes half a minute or so to even acknowledge whatever it is I say to that person.

Communicating with this person is extremely frustrating.

Every time I say something to this person I almost have to ask “Hello, is there anybody home?”

How the fuck do you communicate with someone who stares into space half the time and must be beckoned back each time you ask that person a question?

I also know a guy who’s about 60 who’s memory is completely fucked, has zero EQ and spouts crap half the time, whose behavior is so obnoxious – you should see him eat –  if he had been a horse I would have euthanized him long ago.

But I’ve also know another guy who’s well into his 80’s who as sharp as a tack, is well mannered, sensitive, knowledgeable,  and who doesn’t drool or move like a zombie.

What will I be like ultimately?

An ugly old man, moving in slow-mo, salivating and twitching away or a distinguished elderly gentleman venerated for my grace and urbane decorum?

If you see me deteriorating and going loco, please, I beg of you, please, take me to the highest floor and push me down.

You will be forgiven.

My family and friends will bestow on you rewards and honors the likes of which you would not have dreamed of in your wildest imagination.

And The Loh Foundation will erect a statue in your honor.

Plus, that KFC guy at the Istana may even give you a medal.

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