Wet It First?

A pompous self-declared “cigar king” once said he sometimes puts his cigars under the tap before smoking them to enhance their flavors and the overall smoking experience. One joker heard about it and actually picked up two 2008 Ramon Allones Small Club Coronas to try.

His sage advice: “In order to wet your cigar, you need to place it under a running tap and keep it there for 6 to 7 seconds. The wrapper acts as a repellent, preventing the water from getting into the filler.”

His concluded that the wet one delivers smoke that has a cooler feel. What the fuck! Of course lah, if you wet your cigars or even a stick of celery it’s gonna feel cooler than a dry one, unless you use hot water.

He also said “both cigars burn evenly at start, but the wet cigar starts burning unevenly after the first half. This could have been caused by the wrapper being more soaked on some parts.” Duh!

But he did say that “the wet one produces ample smoke, more than the dry one, that has a richer texture and a darker color” and flavor-wise, the wet one is “more robust and full.”

So if you are retarded or wealthy enough to try, be my guest.

As for me, the only thing that will wet my precious Behikes would be my own equally precious saliva.

What will all those deranged nutcases think of next? Shaft a cigar into a bodily orifice before smoking it?

Well, Bill Clinton may know a thing or two we don’t. Didn’t he do that with that fat cunt Monica Lewinsky?

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