Obnoxious Upgraders

More than 80% of Singaporeans live in Housing & Development Board flats, ie government-built housing.

Mind you, we’re not talking about slums. We’re talking about safe, well-planned estates, with lush landscaping and excellent amenities.

Public housing in Singapore is nothing like public housing in most other countries.

Take a look at Northshore StraitsView, one of the government-built public housing precincts located in Punggol Northshore.

After living in a brand-new flat – very reasonably priced within the reach of every working Singaporean – bought from the government, you are permitted to sell it off. The government imposes a 5-year five-year MOP (Minimum Occupation Period) before you can sell.

Many people make huge profits by selling the moment they have completed the MOP. Flats being sold for over a million bucks are not unheard of. Last month a six-year-old 4-room flat was sold for record S$1.069 million.

Recently, Prime Minister Lee, speaking at the ground-breaking ceremony for Chong Pang City, a ginormous new integrated development in Yishun, said “This is the PAP government’s promise to all Singaporeans: that your HDB flat will be both a good home for you and your family, and a valuable nest egg for your retirement.”

People buy so-called “re-sale” flats because it takes a bit of a wait to buy a brand-new flat from the government. At the peak of the pandemic, the waiting time was around four to five years, up from the pre-pandemic norm of three to four years.

Other restrictions – like income ceiling – also result in government-built housing becoming out of reach to some.

So the re-sale market is hot and thriving!

Flushed with money, those who sell, usually quickly move to a privately-built condominium.

They feel it is more “prestigious.”

Living in a condo, driving a BM, carrying a Louis Vuitton and skiing in Austria; to many retarded Singaporeans, this means they have made it.

Yeah, pathetic, I know.

Below is a picture of a small private condo, with just 18 units. Usually, if it’s a hive of new upgraders, small condos tend to become shit-dumps and toxic nests of venomous vipers, where occupancy does not require a pass in any civility test.

Yup, some humans get to adult size quickly but their brains lag way behind.

They don’t know that the universe doesn’t really care about us anyway.

So what if you live in a condo and drive a BM?

Nobody really cares a fuck, to be honest.

Imagine! Hillbillies moving one level up. In their minds, they are now one up over and above the other 80% still in public housing.

So they behave like assholes most of time. The first affectation they acquire is a swagger. Yes, their body language changes. The males walk like they are suffering from Orchitis and their wives walk as if their cooches have been rimmed by elephants.

Amazing what money can do to people!

And when their condo appreciates in price, they upgrade to a landed property, usually a terrace/link house, so-called “entry-level” landed housing.

That’s when their assholerism also reaches a whole new level.

Not only that, they transform into narcissistic, vainglorious, megalomaniac sleaze bags and braggarts who think they are better than everyone else.

I’m 66, I’ve seen it all. I’ve met them all. I can spot a retarded asshole upgrader a mile off.

They need to beat the fuck out of their overly-swollen pus-filled heads, yes, hammer their fucking bloated heads back to their original size.

I am independently wealthy not because I flip houses.

You are no genius if you are rich because you have been flipping houses all your fucking life.

I know a moron who moves house every few years. That’s not how I want to live, sorry.

My brains, intellect and abilities earned me the gazillions I now have in my private bank accounts parked in offshore tax havens like Papua New Guinea and Lai Châu.

So, upgraders, suck my dick!

NOTE: Dear brainless upgraders, Papua New Guinea and Lai Châu are two most  impoverished shitholes in this part of the world, not tax havens. That bit was meant to be satirical, geddit?!

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